Dedicated to Keren Bogaczyk for finally breaking my writer's block... And on to the show...
Do you know what really grinds my gears
Those people who talk constantly and who talk to hear their own voice. It’s like, thanks for wasting the last 20 seconds of my life. I now want to smack you so that you lose 20 seconds of your life. You have no point. You make no sense. Just stop talking.
Those people that constantly complain about things that they could easily fix, but don’t do anything about it. Venting is one thing. Being a constant pain in my ass is totally different.
Smart people who pretend to be stupid. Really?! Are you five? Do you think that’s attractive? What makes you think that having a more intelligent conversation with a wall than you is a positive thing? And you know what, that can go either way… stupid people who try to be smart really grind my gears as well.
People who leave about 5 cars’ length in front of them while driving or stopped at a light. And for that matter, people who let car after car after car in front of them and then YOU’RE the one to get stuck at a red light.
Steelers fans. That’s all I need to say about that.
But do you know those people that really irk me more than any other type that I’ve already mentioned?! The people who get DRESSED UP to go to the gym! Congratulations, you have achieved the crown for queen of the stupid people. Give yourself a pat on the back. I just want to yell in their face, "HELLOOOOO, YOU’RE WORKING OUT!" Granted, I do go to a gym in
You know how in movies, they always show girls playing sports with their hair down? Seeing girls who are dressed up at the gym is like that. It’s just wrong. And I can tell you (along with any other girl that has played a competitive sport), as an ex-soccer player, no girl runs around on the field chasing a ball with their hair down. It’s not feasible. You would think that movie directors would catch on to this nonsense and learn to be a BIT more realistic and show these players with their hair pulled back into a pony tail. I mean hell, if you want them to look cute, put their hair in French braid pig tails and ribbons. That’s what I used to do in 6th Grade. (It was the cool thing to do back then, don’t judge.)
For a perfect example to this article, as I was working out on Saturday, I saw a girl on the elliptical, probably moving as fast as my dimentiated grandmother would on a treadmill. Her ridiculously long hair was just chillin; no pony tail, no headband, no nothing. She looked like she just walked in off the street, with make-up caked on like whoa times ten and eye make-up darker than anything I would even wear. She was sporting tight black spandex and a cropped, blue spandex top. I don’t think she even broke a sweat. But don’t worry; she was scanning the gym for her future husband like a hawk stalks down its prey.
Let me tell you, when I walk into the gym, I am usually wearing boy's lacrosse shorts and a white Hanes t-shirt (occasionally if I AM feeling fancy, I’ll throw on an Under Armour shirt). Not to mention the fact that I have a ridiculously huge, bulky black knee brace I have to wear. Make-up is washed off. Hair is back in a bun with a hair band wrapped around my entire head to keep all the loose strands back. If you want to talk about the total opposite of cute, that’s it… right there. But hey, I’m there to break a sweat and work out some frustration. It’s only a gym, who would have thought… people, working out? Crazy notion I tell you. So as I conclude this article, I have one plea for all of you... if you want to dress to impress, go somewhere else where people actually care what you look like. If you have resorted to playing your tricks at a gym, congratulations… you have officially hit rock bottom. Oh, and your ridiculousness is not wanted at MY gym! Thank you and good night.
No comments:
Post a Comment